Dear Loved Ones:

From time to time there’s a problem that arises for the class clown, the smirking commentator, the sardonic jokester—things can go off the rails when you’re trying to be sincere; people who know you keep waiting for the punch line. The shtick gets old for those who have to live with it. Just ask Dani, who tells people to wait for the second thing that comes out of my mouth, because the first thing is usually an attempt at humor. She says “attempt” because after years of togetherness, it’s hard to generate new material. I used to make her laugh; now I tend to make her cringe. “If that wasn’t funny,” I’ll ask,