Dear Siblings in Celebration:

I trust you had a lovely Mother’s Day yesterday. In my sermon I made passing reference to Anna Jarvis, largely credited as the creator of our modern Mother’s Day celebration. A deeper dive into her relationship with her own mother reveals the seeds of a strangely co-dependent relationship, but that kind of psychoanalysis I will leave for another time. Suffice it to say Ms. Jarvis was deeply infatuated with the sacrifices her own mother made for her well-being and so wanted a day dedicated to the observance of the hard work each of our mothers puts into our becoming. Her intent, initially observed by her home church in Grafton, West Virginia, in 1908, was an invitation for each and every son and daughter to express appreciation to his or her mother. This is why she was emphatic in stressing the singular Mother’s Day, rather than the plural Mothers’ Day. Jarvis was a dear friend of John Wanamaker, so on that same day in 1908, she hosted a tribute to mothers at Wanamaker’s Department Store in Philadelphia; and she paid to give white carnations to every mother, both at the church and the store.

Jarvis’ efforts culminated in 1914 with President Woodrow Wilson signing a bill affirming the second Sunday in May as Mother’s Day, selected because it was the Sunday closest to Jarvis’ own mother’s birthday. President Wilson stated that the holiday offered a chance to “publicly express our love and reverence for the mothers of our country.”

Obviously, Jarvis was not the first to commend the celebration of our love for maternal devotion. Decades before, poet Julia Ward Howe, who penned “The Battle Hymn of the Republic,” proposed a Mothers’ Day in 1872 which would bring together bereaved mothers from the Confederacy and the Republic for the sole purpose of working towards global peace. Howe, a feminist and a pacifist, believed mothers were the best equipped to convey the pointless loss and destruction left in the wake of war and thereby had great influence in petitioning for violent hostilities to cease. But that grand progressivist agenda melted in the face of more manageable sentimentality. So today, we do not think of the moral power of mothers; we focus instead on the less threatening domestic service of our mommies.

Almost immediately, the florists and confectioners of Philadelphia and New York recognized the genius of the day, and the price of white carnations skyrocketed each Mother’s Day weekend. Recognizing that they had only scratched the market’s potential, a New York florist association announced that red carnations were designated to honor living mothers and white for those who mourned the loss of their own mothers, thereby more than tripling annual sales. Jarvis protested that the flowers were to be shared in loving respect, not pedaled for profit, and dedicated the remainder of her days to protesting the commercial beast she herself had unleashed.

By 1940 Anna Jarvis was liquidating her own substantial fortune to lobby against the Mother’s Day holiday, writing letters to politicians and holding public protests. One Mother’s Day, she came to brunch in the elegant Wanamaker’s dinning room and ordered the Mother’s Day salad, which, when delivered to her table, she promptly dumped on the floor, ranting at the absurdity of profiting from perverting people’s affection for their mothers. She was arrested for disturbing the peace, but charges were later dropped. Completely destitute, Jarvis died on November 24, 1948, a resident of Philadelphia’s Marshall Square Sanitarium. In her honor and in great irony, all funeral expenses were covered by the Philadelphia Florists Association.

“Honor your father and mother,” reads the fifth commandment, and, as the Apostle Paul highlights, it is the first commandment with a promise (Ephesians 6.2): “that your days may be long in the land that the Lord your God is giving you” (Exodus 20.12). Of course, the catch is discerning what is honorable. Paul’s admonition, usually translated “Children, obey your parents in the Lord for this is right” (Ephesians 6.1), clouds the issue a bit as we usually take obedience to mean complete surrender. Paul’s instruction contains the little disclaimer in the Lord, which leaves us the discerning work of honorable behavior.

Anna Jarvis originally intended to do something honorable for her own mother, Ann Maria (nee Reeves), but lost in the juggernaut of 20th century retail, Anna’s desire for honor spiraled beyond her control. Sometimes, when faced with the overwhelming task of showing love and respect, it’s just easier to buy a bunch of flowers.

Missing mom and musing for honorable behavior, I remain,

With Love,
Jonathan Krogh
Your Pastor